Pardon My Venting...

You know what I hate? When people have nothing better to do than screw with the good things in my life!!

I am certainly not perfect and anyone who knows me can tell you that. I am not an expert in relationships. I don't let myself fall in love because of some bitter endings to past relationships. I feel that (for me) the risk of ending up in heartache outweights the reward of possibly finding love. I am very sensitive and when I fall in love, I fall hard.

Recently I was in a relationship with a man I believe I loved. Due to a few variables, the relationship ended. Not only did I lose my boyfriend, I feel I have lost a good friend.

I think that might be what hurts the most. Before I loved him as a boyfriend, I loved him as a friend. Now? Now there is this pit in my stomach that feels empty. I know that sounds dramatic, but I have no other way of describing it. How can a person properly describe the feeling of loss?

Are there things I could have done differently? Absolutely. Are there things I wish that I could do over? Of course. Hindsight is 20/20, and sometimes you have to learn as you go along. It isn't until later you see your mistakes.

I guess I've learned my lesson....If you don't open your heart, you are a lot less likely to get hurt.